A Girl Called Elisa

I know it's been like forever since I last blogged. I've been really busy with assignments, presentations and tests. I don't know how my seniors managed to pull through the 2nd year.

So anyway, of all the stuff that I did these while there's one thing that I'm really glad I did. :)

On the 2nd of March, I attended GIFT's 23rd AGM. I wasn't there for the nomination or anything. I just wanted to see how things were done the GIFT way. I mean, yea, I've attended AGM's before and I think I know how things are done but I still wanted to come.

Actually my senior, Icha asked me whether I was interested in taking over her department (Mission). I declined on the basis that I'm not ready yet. But deep down I know, I'm just looking for an easy way out. So I was caught in between my laziness and my heart. After thinking it over, I decided to really decline the offer. When I declined the offer, something felt weird. It's like, I want to do it but at the same time I don't want to. So when I said my prayers that night, I told God that I'm clueless and if He really wants me to work, He should let me know. And He should make it really obvious. I told Him I really needed help in deciding, i needed courage and guidance too. I didn't sleep much that night. But all the same, I attended the meeting in the morning. 

During the Praise & Worship session that day, something in the song really, I mean like REALLY struck me. 

.."whom shall I send?"

"I will go Lord if you lead me."

And I was like, "is that you, God? You talking to me ka?" 

But I ignored my own question, sebab sya chicken with yellow feathers takut the answer would be, "iya. ko la ba. ko seja yang pemalas sampai pantat berakar di kerusi."

I was pretty sure that I won't be nominated/nominating myself because at that moment I thought that all the posts were already taken. So I kinda smiled to myself because I thought that I was somehow 'safe'.

But boy was I wrong. The post for the vice coordinator of GIFT Faith DD was wide open. Remember the part where I told God that if he wants me, he should call me and make it real obvious? Guess what. That calling came in the form of my own friend, Batheromiaz. Dang, he's loud! What other calling can be be clearer than "ELISA" shouted at the top of his voice? (if you guys knew him, my point will be justified)

I was shocked, of course. I didn't expect that. 

Then I had this emergency chat with God. "You serious ka this? Me? Serious? What this turns out into a disaster? Ko biar betul!"

And I got His assurance in the form of another friend. When I was debating with myself or God or I don't know having inner battles, asking myself "What do You want me to do Lord? Accept ka? Ko yakin? Or should I stand down? What do You want me to do?", Walton walked right up and said, 

"Let God lead you."

You can call me weird or anything, but at that moment I didn't need any more assurance. That was all I needed. So I decided to say yes to the nomination and 'mengiklankan diri'. I didn't really know what to say. I just said what I felt saying. XD Lame o sya kan. Boo ni.

I had the honour of being the Vice Coordinator for GFDD. And I'm glad. And scared. Worried. Might freak out sometimes. 

Yea, you guys might say I'm overreacting over a small matter :) and maybe you're right. There are some fears in me that I hope God would gently heal through this post and I hope I could live up to the post I am holding. 

Who knows, God might work through my department to not only strengthen the faith of the people around us, but myself too. :)

Ciao~